maybe, just maybe

Hello guys.

It's been a really long and tiring week for me in school and I thought that it's good for me to lash out my soreness here ;)

Actually I should be studying right now since mid-year exams are just three weeks or less away but I'm stopping myself from doing so.

I don't know why but I still don't feel the urge to study.

Not forgetting that I do wanna score my exams, like badly.

Okay, maybe I'll try to do something about it after this post.

We'll see ;)

Anyway, this week has been quite a lonely week for me.

You know, sometimes people whom you love drifts away from you while people who you don't really give a damn about, stays.

Is it always this way or is it just me?

Well, I don't really have much friends.

I mean, yes, I have a few friends who I can hang out with when I want to(not all the time actually)

But sometimes, I want something more.

Something more as in, I want someone who'd always be there for me.

Someone who'd sacrifice things for me.

I try to be a good friend for my friends.

I do, I really do.

Maybe because I realize that I'm not the 'joker' of the bunch neither the 'drama-queen'.

I'm just plain.

I'm not the type who can easily cheer people up with the slightest thing I do.

I have to put in a lot to show my friends that I'm really true in our friendship.

And yes, I've got to admit I'm really afraid of losing my friends.

Mainly because I don't have many and that is why I treasure them.

nothing much

Hey guys.

It's been a long time since I last had a proper post about what's going on with me.

Yes, I've got to admit that I'm a super lazy blogger and sometimes I just don't find things to blog about.

Maybe that's just mainly due to how boring my life actually is.

Anyway, I've decided to start posting new posts more often (interesting or not, I don't give a damn anymore, lol) just to keep this blog more lively.

Since this is my last year in high school and all, I think it is necessary to write down somewhere about what's really going on in case one day, I might wanna look back at those memories.

For now, I'm going to keep this short and peace out.

unable to grasp

Do you know how it feels when you're so furious but you just have to hold the anger inside?

Like when you can find anything to break or punch or bang or anything, nor you have anyone with you to spill out all that's building inside. That's when you'll break apart because the pressure within your little heart is uncontrollable. 

Well, this morning, for the second time in my entire life, I was so furious that tears welled up. I couldn't calm down the fire that was burning bright inside me, hence the tears.  

do you believe in God?

I do believe in God; it's religion I don't believe in.

Have you ever felt so alone that when you want someone to go for a movie with you, you realize you've got no one to ask?