how do you accept failure

Haven't wrote for such a long time I almost forgot how it feels like to spill almost everything here.
College is not exactly like what I thought it would be or I'd rather say it's nothing like what I wanted it to be.
I am more busy than I have ever been all my life.
My routine includes studying and exercising only.
Leisure time is getting lesser day by day and I don't even have the time to pamper myself anymore.
What more about sleep? It is definitely a luxury to me.
I can literally fall asleep anywhere at anytime now for the accumulation of not getting enough sleep is probably overflowing.
I have been failing to meet all my lecturers' expectations again and again.
Hard work and perseverance helps but I haven't been improving a lot.
Last week has been one awful week.
The thought of having to disappoint my parents broke me but in the end I've decided to continue what I am doing and to just put in as much effort as possible.
At this moment, I can only put as much concentration on studies as I can.
The possibilities of having fun or time for myself have to be eliminated.
Yes I am tired, more tired than I had ever been but I've got no choice.
I chose this and this is what I have to bear with.
Scrolling pictures of my high school best friends having fun among themselves definitely breaks my heart but for the next coming 11 months, this is what I have to live with.